Surat: Moondust

I don't know if writing about you all this time was a good thing or a bad thing, because when I write about you, I could at least empty my mind with all those thoughts of you that is embedded in my mind and find some inner peace but it also reminded me of all conversations that made my heart beat a little bit faster, how your eyes were made of two diamonds and how I felt at home around you. I confessed everything I had in this small heart to you. I wanted to make life much more interesting for both of us.

I think writing about you is better because it makes me remember about you, the things we did, and the connection we had. You were once the hero in all of my bedtime stories, I would never forget how you shine like the stars, how we shared so much of the same interests, how my eyes set itself on you and felt happiness. There's no bad memory of us together until we parted ways. I made you promise that what makes you feel comfortable should be what I follow and you asked to be set free. You know what is best for you and no one should be in your away in achieving happiness.

I hope it will always be easy for you to carve a smile and laugh genuinely. You're vulnerable, we all are on the inside but engrave in your mind that you are capable of greatness. If things are hard now, remember that there's still a long way to go in living, you have dreams you want to achieve. Don't let the darkness cloud your rationality. Keep pushing forward and I promise you that a field of hydrangeas is waiting for you out there.

I know things wont ever be the same as we have hurt each other and I also know that once I have decided to put something behind, there's no reason for me to go back to that place again. It's okay to miss someone without wanting that person back. My heart still beats despite all these weathers and we both are more than capable of moving forward. My heart is content with how my life streams now and I know you are experiencing the same. 

Our time was brief but my heart remembers a gentle embrace. There was no wreckage until the day I realised that I'm used to looking at your back instead of your eyes. Maybe you loved me, maybe I did, but absence made both of our egos win. Why? because strangers cannot start a conversation with "I miss you" eventhough that's everything they have to say. You met someone new and God pulled us away to get a grip on how life works. Change is inevitable and we were meant to cross paths, perhaps only to teach each other few lessons and not to love one another. We're all wanderers after all.

Thank you for the good memories we shared. Be happy.

xoxo,

Husna Anith